This is a tough one… But here it goes…
Integrity matters - yup - me again on my soapbox - LOL! But man - it really does!
I can of course see why there is a pull toward being dishonest - for several reasons. It’s easier sometimes. You don’t have to deal with your own feelings or the feelings of others - if you just pretend. I really do get it. Many times over the course of my life I have thought about it.
But I have this weird physical reaction to being dishonest - I think I get it from my parents - they were/are two of the most honest people I know and everything that I have learned about integrity comes from lessons I learned from them.
It’s definitely not the easy road - I mean - sometimes? I guess?
But how do we learn from our mistakes and how do we grow as human beings if we are not honest with ourselves and with others? I just don’t get it!
There is the other matter that sometimes people know you are being dishonest -you aren’t fooling them. I couldn’t live with that - it would eat away at me… knowing others knew that I was not being truthful. I could never lie to my parents (weird that way I guess). I told a lie to them in elementary school and when I went out for drinks with them on my 18th birthday - I confessed - HA! HA!
And of course - I am not talking about being “brutally honest” There is always a way to be kind when you are being honest with others.
Back to being honest with yourself... How do you sleep at night knowing that you are pretending? That what you are putting out in the world is not real?
My music colleagues and I emerged from a program at Brandon University that stressed the importance of growth… of surrounding yourselves with people who were better than you and who you could learn from. Man - over the years - both in Manitoba and Alberta - and beyond, actually - I have learned SO much from SO many!!
Over the years, there were occasions where people in my profession did not display integrity and were not honest. I can tell you that it was not a secret. Others were aware and professional respect was lost. That is the price paid for such dishonesty.
As a woman and a mother, I have learned so many lessons from the friends I have surrounded myself with. Some have not been easy lessons and some have been profound. And when I think back to my younger self… I realize how much I did not know.
But what I do know about that time? No matter how many mistakes I made or disasters I encountered (sometimes caused) I always tried to get better. Always. Sure there was some wallowing and self pity at times… but eventually I would rally and face what I was experiencing or had experienced.
Integrity matters. It’s not always easy but it is always important. Always.
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