MY DAD
My dad was a truly great guy. I mean, he wasn’t perfect, but he was wonderful. I listen to some of his adult nieces and nephews speak of him and I know I am not the only one who thinks so. He was just - one of those people… he could talk to anyone. He was charming and funny. I loved him very much.
He was buried 33 years ago today; he would have been 80 years old. He was gone - too - soon. It was the first time I learned that we should never take the ones we love for granted. His death was so shocking to me - so tragic.
We did not have a lot of money when I was growing up - but I really don’t think I realized it while I was living it. Because - we always had what we needed - and when we had an opportunity to do something that would be good for us? My dad always found a way. Whether it was figure skating lessons for my sister or band camp for me. He never denied us anything.
I often wonder if that contributed to him dying so young. The stress of worrying about money, wondering if he could give his daughters what they needed. Looking back, I wish I had been more sensitive to his worry.
My dad, Larry, was a dreamer. He was always thinking about ways he could change things up, make more money for his family, find more ways to make the people in his life happy… he was such a great guy.
He had demons too, and life was not always kind to him. He was trusting and cared deeply about the people in his life. There were a few things that did not go the way they were supposed to… he was supposed to be first in line to purchase the local paper from my hometown but that didn’t happen. You see, we left for a few short years and I wonder if that is why his boss, who he respected very much, didn’t keep his word. It really affected my dad. Later, in the late 70’s/ early 80’s, he had a very successful insulation business with his brother. My dad really liked to be his own boss… and then - well - it was the 80’s! And to make matters worse, it was then that the health issues with foam insulation came to light. My dad lost his business. There was an opportunity for him to continue it and fulfill contracts with the government to take out the same insulation that he had put in but - his “partner” was not interested. Sadly, we also lost our house.
I think these things impacted my dad more than I would have known as a younger person. I think it haunted him…
Nevertheless, he persevered.
He and my mum were high school sweethearts and like any couple they had their issues; even separating for a year while my sister and I were in university. It still amazes me how much that hurt me and how emotional I was. The empty nest was hard on them. The two of them were incredibly involved parents. My dad was both president of the Band Parent Association and president of the Figure Skating Club at different times while I was growing up…
Moving back to the town they grew up in was hard on my parents, you know the saying, “you can’t go home again”. My mum was strong enough to know she needed a change and my dad didn’t want to change. I think this is common in relationships? So - they “separated” and my mum moved to Winnipeg. And they dated :) And my dad came around and they found their way back to each other again.
He was a giver and he wore his heart on his sleeve. He loved deeply. People were drawn to him. My house was the safe place that all my friends felt comfortable coming to. He was such a good guy. I am SO lucky to have had him as a dad.
That is why today it is still so hard for me at times… I really miss him. I am happy that he knew Mark but it breaks my heart that he never got to meet my boys, any of his 5 grandsons. He would have loved them and they, him. I sometimes imagine what it would be like to sit around the kitchen table with him and my mum, my sister and the 5 boys.
So today, I remember him and the wonderful father he was. Rest in peace, Larry.
Comments